Ever been stuck in holiday traffic fighting to be stuck in a holiday cashier’s line so you can purchase low-priced presents on your high-balance Visa listening to high-volume holiday music and think, “Why am I doing this to myself?! I don’t even really LIKE Christmas. It’s just a scheme to get me to gain more… Continue reading →

Pastor Fred Phelps and his Westboro Baptist Church congregation – also known as the “God Hates Fags” picketers – have no place in a polite society. But we don’t live in a polite society. We live in this one. And in this one we are guaranteed the freedom of speech. If you’re for free speech,… Continue reading →

Americans are now in a global economy. We’re citizens of the world. We’re engaged in delicate diplomacy made all too apparent by Wikileaks. Our markets are complex. Foreign markets are complex. Economics are complex. Communications are complex. In the last century we went from the horse and buggy to the Y2K buggy. Over 300 million… Continue reading →

The template for the perpetual Sarah Palin feud was set last Valentine’s Day. The animated series Family Guy aired an episode in which a character with Down Syndrome said her mother was the former Governor of Alaska. From her platform as a paid Fox News contributor, Palin pounced on the moment to condemn Seth MacFarlane…. Continue reading →

Imagine an entire 24-hour cable news network devoted to political causes. Many of their employees are future and former candidates for president, giving them a national platform to reach potential voters. Entire “movements” of political discourse are not only showcased ”” they’re even started on this news channel. Fundraising, the toughest part of running for… Continue reading →

It’s an odd Americanism to elect someone to be in government who freely admits they don’t like government. As if reluctance translates into competence. “Oh he’ll be a great husband, especially since he doesn’t believe in marriage.” For some reason, we buy the premise of politicians begging to be a part of the thing they… Continue reading →

Five years ago, on one of my “UFO Tours” (coined by comedian Bill Hicks, when you only appear in small towns in front of a handful of people so you start to doubt your own existence), I had a show in Burley, Idaho – home to some of the warmest and most hospitable inhabitants I’ve… Continue reading →

If you happen to mention the name Hillary Clinton to my grandmother, she’ll pause, lock her jaw and declare, “That woman” ambitious.” That’s all she has to say about Clinton because, after all, Granny’s polite. Also, the first female Speaker of the House’s name is akin to a curse word – something you say when… Continue reading →

It takes a special kind of 3-D hyperbole to curl your eyelashes and simultaneously drop your jaw. Newt Gingrich’s declarations produce an Andy Kaufman type of discomfort, where I don’t know if what I’m hearing is brilliant, offensive or intentionally comedic. “What if [Obama] is so outside our comprehension, that only if you understand Kenyan,… Continue reading →

The beginning of the end for the Tea Party faux revolution occurred this Sunday on ABC’s This Week. Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell effectively tipped his hand when asked whether the Tea Party will help or hurt Republicans. “One thing we know about everybody who’s been active in this movement, we know none of them… Continue reading →

In order to “make news” something must be” new, or weird, or unusual. It’s already assumed we know the old and usual – so news is the opposite of that. We read about outliers and changes happening in any given day. Anything sticking out as different is considered newsworthy. So anti-war protesters protesting (yawn) gets… Continue reading →

Disillusionment implies at some point you were illusioned. You believed something that turned out not to be true. I watched a documentary where young people in the early ”˜90s thought their music was “alternative,” and then they were disillusioned when grunge became mainstream. “It’s like” what can you believe in anymore, man.” The point is:… Continue reading →

The term “net neutrality” has the magical property of making most people’s eyes glaze over. First, it sounds like a gambling term. “I have a system and net neutrality ”” I can’t lose!” Second, no one using the Internet calls it “the net” anymore. Just like no one in San Francisco calls it “Frisco.” So… Continue reading →

In case you missed some of the lowlights of the 20th century, one Florida charismatic pastor is trying to bring them back. Yes, Pastor Terry Jones of Gainesville is planning a Koran burning for the ninth anniversary of 9/11. His church, the ironically named Dove World Outreach Center, plans to show their contempt for the… Continue reading →