Tina Dupuy

1. David Letterman
2. Wall Street Journal/Sudeep Reddy
3. Senator Lisa Murkowski (R)
4. Levi Johnston
5. Shannyn Moore
6. Katie Couric
7. Nicolle Wallace
8. Steve Schmidt
9. Kate Gosselin
10. The Fed/Ben Bernanke
11. Pete Rouse
12. Joe McGinniss
13. Peggy Noonan
14. Ashley Judd
15. Congressman Spencer Bachus (R)
16. Alaska State Trooper Mike Wooten
17. Joe Miller
18. Politico
19. Karl Rove
20. State Department (Ahmadinejad’s birthday)
21. Rahm Emanuel
22. Family Guy/Seth MacFarlane
23. Michelle Obama
24. President Barack Obama
25. Kathleen Gustafson
26. Brian Williams
27. Emily’s List
28. Ed Gillespie
29. Mayor Michael Bloomberg
30. Environmentalists
31. Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger (R)
32. Michael J. Gross
33. Vice President Al Gore
34. Charlie Gibson
35. Maureen Dowd
36. Bloggers
37. Rachel Maddow
38. 60 Minutes
39. Mark Halperin
40. John Heilemann
41. Nick Denton/Gawker
42. Barbara Bush
43. U.S. Export Import Bank
44. Blogger Jesse Griffin
45. Blogger Dennis Zaki
46. Andrew Sullivan/The Atlantic
47. Keith Olbermann
48. CSU students AKA “Dumpster Divers” Ashley Briggs and Alicia Lewis
49. Blogger Jeanne Devon
50. Palingates
51. Linda Kellen Biegel AKA Celtic Diva
52. Oliver Stone
53. John Bitney
54. Senator Scott Brown (R)
55. Alaska State Senate President Lyda Green
56. Andree McLeod
57. AFL-CIO President Richard Trumka
58. PolitiFact
59. Bill Ayers
60. Secretary Madeleine Albright
61. Senator John Kerry (D)
62. Jonathan Martin
63. NPR
64. Congressman Alan Grayson (D)
65. Stephen Colbert
66. Helen Thomas
67. PETA
68. Anchorage Daily News
69. Tina Fey
70. Andrew Halcro
71. Kim Chatman
72. Julian Assange
73. Frank Gwartney
74. Aaron Sorkin
75. Alaska Public Safety Commissioner Walter Monegan
76. Charles Krauthammer
77. Rick Santorum
78. TIME Magazine
79. Westboro Baptist Church
80. Michael Moore
81. Taegan Goddard
82. Kathy Griffin
83. Governor Chris Christie (R)
84. Hacker David Kernell
85. Daily Caller/Chris Moody
86. AOL
87. Rapper Common
88. Governor Mitt Romney
89. Megyn Kelly
90. Juan Williams
91. Governor Rick Perry
92. Herman (Herb) Cain

Honorable mentions (by popular demand): William Shakespeare, President Ronald Reagan, President John F. Kennedy, American Idol contestants, that Caribou, the First Amendment and Paul Revere.

These are media feuds former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin, has participated in from the last two years since she was launched from obscurity. It should be noted they’re in no particular order. I’ve also omitted people who just jab at her without her responding (e.g. Meghan McCain) but those are rare.

This is a work in progress – including typos. Check back as more names are added. When I originally published the list in November there were under 50 names. I’ve added more as people have sent me more names that qualify. And then of course, she starts new ones. And then I add those.

This list started as an overflow of names that couldn’t fit into my column: America’s Full-Time Professional Duelist

Know of a feud I missed? Send me an email.

UPDATE – January 8, 2011: In the wake of the shooting in Arizona of Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, it needs to be clarified that this list is of the media feuds Palin has been involved in. The list of 20 congresspeople Palin had on TakeDownthe20.com with riflescope graphics over their districts (including Giffords) is not this list. That graphic has been scrubbed from Palin’s site and still available here.

UPDATE – March 30, 2011: I’m thinking of calling this the Palin Squrimishes List.

This was in the Minneapolis/St. Paul airport.

Well, they’ve always been good at selling crap…

My room smells like french fries…

So if you’re generally an unhelpful, snotty yet slow witted person…best not to work at a hotel. What with all the annoying people asking you dumb questions like,”Where’s the work out room?” and “Is there a good place to eat?” Sorry to tear you away from Yahoo Games, Princess, but I just need a straight fucking answer sans the ‘tude’.

Anyway, I had my first gym experience last night. Yep. I went to a gym for the first time…ever. I found where one was on the internet. I drove to it. I gave them $10 and I went and used their equipment. This sounds fairly simple if you havent spent the past decade or so chain smoking and making fun of people that went to gyms.

I think I speak for everyone when I say that seeing someone more out of shape than myself makes me feel better. Actually, the first thing I did was scan for that person. That person that seems to feel a little more uncomfortable than me. That person was there. Actually several of those people were there. Actually all of us there were in that boat. Yeah, we were all just gasping and sweating and judging each other harshly.

Then suddenly it all went sour. Yes, suddenly – out of now where, manifesting herself as if she were straight out of my worst fear, she sauntered to the cardio area. That chick that not only generally looks great – she looks great when she sweats.

As she started the stair master/cross country/tread mill thingy…I realized that this is the same woman that ruins karaoke. It’s all fun. Everyone sucking and sadly murdering their favorite songs, then SHE shows up and does an a capella version of a Whitney Houston song and then the entire bar realizes that they suck. There is a collective moment where we all know that we should never waste another moment singing under the guise of fun…The fun is gone. Because of her…show off.

So anyway, I was working out at a gym. I fell off the tread mill…twice.

Now most people are afraid of having people laugh at them…But when you’re a comedian…

I’m in Washington State…damn it.

Here’s an ‘only in California’ thing…

I drove through a tree. Serious. I was doing a gig near the Redwood Forrest this weekend and saw a sign for the drive thru tree.

I forked over my five dollars and then drove through a tree older than Caesar.

Some of you may remember this brilliant bit of legislation called The Do Not Call list.

Yeah, our government got together and realized that Americans were getting annoyed by telemarketers. So they made a list, checked it twice and this was going to reduced those phone calls.

Those callers exempt from that call list:
-Non-profit organizations
-Companies you’ve done business with in the past 18 months
-Politicians.

Who do I get unsolicited calls from? Who are the ONLY people that call me?
-Non-profit organizations
-Companies you’ve done business with in the past 18 months
-Politicians.

So that was ineffective.

And in the spirit of being ineffective – I propose the Do Not Spy List.

Here’s how it works:

There’s a list. You put your name on it. That means that you don’t want to be spied on.

Those exempt from this list:
-Non-profit organizations
-Companies you’ve done business with in the past 18 months
-Politicians.

I think I’ve got a handle on this. I should run for office.