Reach out and touch someone

Another comedian (Eugene Mirman) beat me to the punch on this one.

Hysterical article.

Conservative Phone Company Exploits Wedge Issues for Profit
UAT: UAT, Mr. Mirman, is the only carrier that is taking an active stand against same-sex marriages and hardcore child pornography.

MIRMAN: I think all child pornography is hardcore … It’s all wrong. AT&T sponsors child pornography?

UAT: No, no. That’s MCI.

MIRMAN: MCI sponsors hardcore child pornography?

UAT: Yes, they have a pedophile Web site for men who love boys. Uh, it’s a Montreal-based Web site.

MIRMAN: Oh my God! Our Canadian pervert neighbors!

UAT: Mmm hmm.

MIRMAN: So MCI basically has a child pornography ring.

UAT: That’s correct.

Eat your heart out – Ben and Jerry’s!

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